2/2/2016
a pretty rough day.....
so basically it was recess and as usual, i checked my phone. it stated i had 9 miss calls, 7 from my sister and 2 from my grandma.. i knew something was amiss.... i later went on and check out my messages and realise i had acccidentally left with my sister key and i locked her out of her house. i panicked and only to receive messages from my sister saying that she had already climbed out of her window and went to work but reported late because of me. i felt guilty but it didnt stop there... my grandma messaged me and my heart literally felt like it was stabbed repeatedly when i saw her message... dont she understand how hard is it to be this young and having a broken family... does she not understand what i need now is just accompany and love from family?? what is wrong asking my sister to come back and stay with me?? all i want is to just have a loved one in this house with me? yes i know my sister is married and she has all the rights to go and stay with her husband but has anyone truly know how i feel??? CRIED. i frking cried during lessons and my friends saw, i tried to overcome the tears that threatened me, i put on a smile and laugh but i guess tears was still coming out of my eyes. I HATE THAT FEELING, i hate how im feeling so low but i just have to keep my emotions inside and act like im still all happy. i hate having tears coming out of my eyes but i still laughing... FAKELY.... im such a burden.. i just wish i wasnt here anymore....
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
archery!
ARE YOU GUYS A FAN OF ARCHERY??
Schools out!! finally the holidays omg!! so this holiday i am planning to learn archery, well it is not a rash decision of mine but i actually wanted to do it since 2 years ago but I have not gotten the time to and chance . What made me wanna learn it? (warning: this reason is absurd) I AM A HUGE HUNGER GAMES FAN and it was seeing katniss everdeen (jennifer lawrence) holding the bow and arrow that made me go "this is so cool!!!" that made me wanna learn it HAHA. Yes i know this is a pretty lame reason but I just fell in love with archery. Lets just cross our fingers that my mum will allow me to pick up this unique sport hehe:)
Schools out!! finally the holidays omg!! so this holiday i am planning to learn archery, well it is not a rash decision of mine but i actually wanted to do it since 2 years ago but I have not gotten the time to and chance . What made me wanna learn it? (warning: this reason is absurd) I AM A HUGE HUNGER GAMES FAN and it was seeing katniss everdeen (jennifer lawrence) holding the bow and arrow that made me go "this is so cool!!!" that made me wanna learn it HAHA. Yes i know this is a pretty lame reason but I just fell in love with archery. Lets just cross our fingers that my mum will allow me to pick up this unique sport hehe:)
friendship?
Hello! time for my first post ya!
I have a friend that is pretty close to me and i feel like we are drifting apart from each other and i shall call him B. Just a brief intro, B and i were not in the same class when we first met each other and we only got closer when he texted me (it was regarding another person). It was there when we started to talk to each other daily and he became my closest friend. Of course, it was pretty awkward in real life due to the fact that we only talk to each other offline on WA. After a few months, i started to realise that i grew more and more dependent on him and he was the one that pulled me through some of my problems. We could literally talk anything under the sun, from studies to dogs to friends to movie etc. Soon enough, we probably grew feelings towards each other but we were both unsure about it. Even though we did hint to each other through our text, none of us have actually said it in fear that we only treated each other as friends (unsure if it was a r/s or best friend kind of thing).
Probably after 2-3 months later, we grew tired of each other and when we chatted on WA, we would ran out of topics to talk to each other. After reading Naomi Neo post, it really hit me that when there isnt any fun anymore in a relationship, we will get tired of each other. AND by saying that, i do not mean that i did get into a relationship with B but we were certainly more than friends.... and due the fact that we always ran out of nothing to talk to each other... there was pretty much nothing interesting going on in our conversation now. Im pretty sure looking at the state now, we had already lost feelings for each other and it really made me wonder, "was it the fun that make me think i had feelings for him" and "is it the fun that only keeps a relationship going?"
well i really dont know, all i hope is that our friendship remains the same...
I have a friend that is pretty close to me and i feel like we are drifting apart from each other and i shall call him B. Just a brief intro, B and i were not in the same class when we first met each other and we only got closer when he texted me (it was regarding another person). It was there when we started to talk to each other daily and he became my closest friend. Of course, it was pretty awkward in real life due to the fact that we only talk to each other offline on WA. After a few months, i started to realise that i grew more and more dependent on him and he was the one that pulled me through some of my problems. We could literally talk anything under the sun, from studies to dogs to friends to movie etc. Soon enough, we probably grew feelings towards each other but we were both unsure about it. Even though we did hint to each other through our text, none of us have actually said it in fear that we only treated each other as friends (unsure if it was a r/s or best friend kind of thing).
Probably after 2-3 months later, we grew tired of each other and when we chatted on WA, we would ran out of topics to talk to each other. After reading Naomi Neo post, it really hit me that when there isnt any fun anymore in a relationship, we will get tired of each other. AND by saying that, i do not mean that i did get into a relationship with B but we were certainly more than friends.... and due the fact that we always ran out of nothing to talk to each other... there was pretty much nothing interesting going on in our conversation now. Im pretty sure looking at the state now, we had already lost feelings for each other and it really made me wonder, "was it the fun that make me think i had feelings for him" and "is it the fun that only keeps a relationship going?"
well i really dont know, all i hope is that our friendship remains the same...
introduction
Hello guys! I am a female and I have recently started this blog to share with you guys my feelings and also simple things like how my life goes! :)
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